My leading role

March 25^th, 2006

I want to preface this entire post by saying that one of my first thoughts this morning was that I’ve never been a celebrity and that it must be a cool experience. I don’t know where I come up with this stuff, but my head is full of such silly thoughts.

I arranged to tour the Mekong Delta through my hotel. I heart concierge. The tour group was small, with only three other people on the tour. Interestingly enough, one guy is Japanese, but lives in Hong Kong. The couple were South African and Chinese, but they lived in Shenzen in Mainland China, which is about 20 minutes from where I live. Small world.

Our first stop was at a coconut candy manufacturer. More accurately, four people make coconut candy in a hut by the river. The candy was delicious and the people were wonderful. We then moved on to the honey factory, where maybe 6 people work (also in a hut). They served us honey tea (excellent), which included added pollen. Glad I’m not allergic. The guide let us hold the bees, which I don’t plan to do again. Why tempt them? Next, we listened to a local band who sang, “If you’re Happy and you Know it,” in Vietnamese. We then headed back to the boat via a village canal. I think my favorite part was that they asked us to wear the traditional Vietnamese hat. So cute. I kind of wish I was allowed to row the boat, but they don’t let whitey do such things. We enjoyed a traditional Vietnamese lunch at our final stop and then headed back to Ho Chi Minh City. Oh yeah, a water buffalo lives outside of the restaurant. Hmmm.. seems and odd place to me.

Everything up to this point was super interesting and thoroughly entertaining, but I could never have imagined what was to happen next. I called my tour guide from the previous day because she invited me to go out to dinner that night. She is wonderful. She’s 30 years old, single, and the oldest of three kids. Sound like anyone you know? We immediately hit it off on our trip the day before, so I was thrilled to spend the evening with such a cool person. She picked me up on her motor bike and took me to her house to meet her family. I was prepared for this and really excited about it. What I didn’t know is that she lives with her Aunt and a bunch of other people who were absolutely thrilled to meet me. Her Aunt was so thrilled that she asked if I would like to join them for dinner rather than going out! How could I refuse a real home-cooked Vietnamese dinner? I don’t have any pictures of our dinner because I didn’t want to make this a tourist moment. These people treated me as a friend, not a visitor. They totally rolled out the red carpet by constantly serving me fresh fruit and tea. They even created a special avocado drink for me with avocado, milk, and sugar. It was wonderful. Dinner was also wonderful, but I didn’t dare to ask what I was eating. I think it was sausage, but I can’t be sure. Over the next three hours, Hong introduced me to her Aunt, her cousin, her Aunt’s boyfriend, her brother, and another girl who I didn’t catch how she fit into the family. Hong was the only person who spoke English at a conversational level, so you can imagine what we talked about when Hong left the room. Even without words, Ann (the Aunt) was clearly one of the kindest people I’ve ever met. I can’t really describe it, but she had the kindest eyes and the most cheerful smile.

After dinner, Ann and Hong wanted to take me to a dance club. I didn’t know what to expect, so I was a little apprehensive (not that I ever let them know that). As it turns out, the dance club is a huge room with rows of seats facing the dance floor. The dancers are all really talented (except for me, of course). The men walk over to the women and ask them to dance. They don’t have to know each other and its not necessarily a pick-up line. Many of the men are older. I couldn’t help but thinking of what they experienced during the war. Within seconds of the music starting, a nice gentleman approached me to dance. I really preferred to sit out for a bit, but I thought that would be rude, so I accepted his offer. I am not a good dancer. Especially not if I have to put my feet in particular places at particular times. Amber = uncoordinated (but you already know that).

Over the next three hours, I got my chance to experience celebrity status. The rules of politeness are that a guy should keep his partner on the dance floor for one dance at a time. He is welcome to ask her to dance again, but he shouldn’t monopolize his partner’s time. Every time that I sat down between songs, someone else was asking me to dance. I probably would have enjoyed this a bit more, but they all wanted to teach me the moves and not only can I not understand their English, I can only hear about 15% of what they are saying. You see my trouble.

After the formal dancing ends, the club turns into a disco. If I was a busy girl up to this point, I’m not sure what you would call me after this point. The most adorable Vietnamese men surrounded me on the dance floor. One was not adorable at all, but I’ll come back to that. When just dancing around didn’t seem interesting enough, they decided to pull me into the middle of the circle and hold a dance-off in my honor. I promise I am not lying! I couldn’t make up something this good. One by one, they walked to the middle of the circle to take their turn dancing with me. Picture me standing in the middle looking completely shocked and not knowing what to do. With the exception of a couple of touchy feely boys, most of the guys were wonderful. The primary exception from this was the guy who I will call Spaz. Spaz danced like his entire body was convulsing. Picture break dancing without laying on the ground. I swear he was on something. Ann and Hong are just taking all of this in, even when Spaz picked me up with both hands and started spinning me around. Ann finally stepped in when Spaz dragged me to the other side of the dance club to do God knows what. I’d venture that he intended to kidnap me, but I’d prefer to not think about such things. We left soon after that because the near kidnapping put a damper on my little stint as a celebrity. I do have a video that I will try to post at some point.

On the way home, Hong decided that I needed to eat since my flight was so early in the morning. She and Ann took me to a Pho stand right by my hotel before dropping me safely off at my hotel. 3:30 came very early the next morning.